Q.
Where is my clitoris?
A.
(I get asked this question
a lot. Try your public library, get a book on Human Anatomy
& Physiology. Look at their drawings for a better understanding
of the anatomy). * Update, go to page 15
or the FAQ pages for a
drawing of the female anatomy.
I
can't tell you exactly where yours is, but I will answer these
faqs. “Where is the clitoris located in the female?”
“Is it different in every female", “what is
the easiest way to locate it?"
The clitoris is an extremely sensitive erectile organ located
below the pubic bone, within and close to the top of the labia.
The labia (majora and minora) are the outer and inner folds
of skin that surround the clitoris, the urethra opening, and
the vagina.
Yes,
the urethra is where you pee out of.
The
glans (or tip) of the clitoris, is the part that you can see.
It attaches to the shaft, which runs along internally from
the glans. The clitoris connects to a branching interior system
of erectile tissue that runs throughout a woman's genital
area. The erectile tissue responds to sexual arousal by filling
with blood and becoming harder and erect, similar to a man's
penis.
During
sexual excitement the clitoris swells and changes position
a bit, but don't expect it to look erect like a penis does.
The clitoris is covered by a clitoral hood that is actually
part of the labia. The size and shape of the clitoris varies
in each woman, although its location is pretty much the same
for all women.
For more on the female anatomy see Hymen and your Vagina...
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Q.
I recently touched my girlfriend's vagina and I think my hand
still had dried semen on it from... (whatever). Could she
get pregnant from this?
A.
Not from that, but maybe
you should be washing your hands more often. Although sperm
can live for up to 5 - 6 days inside the female body, note
that I said up to, it can not live very long on clothing,
hands or tabletop. I would be very surprised if there were
even any still living on your hand 2 hours later. Sorry if
you wanted to hear something else. I don't see fatherhood
in your future from that.
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Q.
I'm a 21 year old female
and have been with my boyfriend for two years. We have had
sex for over a year now and I am still unable to have an orgasm
during sex with him. Is this normal for most women?
A.
It is very common for young women to have difficulty achieving
orgasm, particularly
during intercourse. But, I don't really know why.
Most
women are able to figure out some way they can reach orgasm,
whether it is through oral or manual stimulation. The problem
may be that in general there is entirely too much focus on
the mechanical aspects of the female sexual functioning.
One
consistent feature that I have noticed to be overlooked (from
the email that I get) is the emotional connection women have
with their sexual functioning. Most women who are able to
feel comfortably intimate with their partners, and who have
partners who are loving and responsive to their needs, will
function well physically and orgasm easily.
Your
partner's emotional support and awareness of your needs is
really important. You may not have control over this, but
you should learn to express your needs to that person. Look
carefully at this relationship to be sure there is in fact
an intimate connection. If there are significant shortcomings,
recognize that most relationships in your age group do ultimately
end. (Sorry, a fact of life). BUT, they are part of the learning
process, which leads to understanding who you are in a relationship
and what your needs are sexually, emotionally and intimately.
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Q.
Me and my girlfriend are
having a baby. She is in her fourth month, can we have sex
and will it hurt the baby?
A.
Unless your midwife or obstetrician
has told you otherwise, you and your girl can have sex. Unless
there are complications with the pregnancy, it is safe to
have sex because the fetus is protected by a cushioning sac
of amniotic fluid that surrounds it. Think of a chicken egg
-- your fetus is like the yellow yolk part in the middle of
all that egg white.
Pregnancy
can affect sex in other ways, however. Hormonal changes that
accompany pregnancy often influence a woman's moods, which
could influence her desire to have sex. For some couples,
nausea, weight gain and fatigue may present challenges to
sex and the enjoyment of it.
Changing
positions is important because some women may experience sex
differently while they're pregnant. What they once found pleasurable
before pregnancy may no longer feel the same. That's why it
can help for the woman to listen to her body and act appropriately.
This is especially true if a woman has any pain or uterine
bleeding, or if her "water is broken," in which case she'll
need to avoid sexual intercourse and see a health care provider
right away.
Your
midwife or obstetrician should be able to advise you on these
matters. Don't be afraid to ask questions.
